A brush with sporting greatness

Well hello everybody. Last Sunday was the final home game of the season for the Huddersfield Giants. As has been the case for much of the season the game ended in disappointment. A small number of the players signed autographs and a couple posed for photos but most just disappeared down the tunnel. That was very disappointing particularly for younger fans. However, my personal thanks go out to the following players: Eorl Crabtree, Rod Jensen and Leroy Cudjoe.

Special thanks go to:

STUART JONES

AND ANDY RALEIGH

Obviously it goes without saying that it was the Giants who were rubbing shoulders with a future great. For those who keep up to date with these things Tom starts his rugby season next weekend. I understand that there will be a few weeks of training before the first competitive match and then it'son with the good, friendly, violent fun.

So on with the film reviews, you've all been waiting for. Sunday night has a couple of excellent films either of which would be good entertainment. Tim Burton's original Batman is an excellent bridge between the camp 1960's classic and the new version by Christopher Nolan. Michael Keaton does sullen well but the undoubted star of the show is Jack Nicholson. He steals the show as The Joker. This is often the case in Batman films. Jack has always played psychos very well. It was a welcome return to the Dark Knight version of the legend and nobody does dark and gothic quite like Tim Burton. Also on Sunday night there is the remake of The Thomas Crown Affair. Now I may be something of a heretic but I actually prefer this version to the original. Pierce Brosnan is suave, cool and sophisticated and is ably supported by Rene Russo. Now I saw the original after this version and was left disappointed. It was good but not as enjoyable as the remake. The only real downside is Sting's version of Windmills of Your Mind.

On Tuesday night there is Van Helsing. It is alright and is certainly not a desperately worthy film. It is just good fun and no more than that. On Wednesday night there is Stealth. It is a kind of WarGames for the 21st century. It is probably more style than substance but again it is good fun.

Friday night we have The Bourne Supremacy. The Bourne series is credited with giving the Bond franchise a kick and leading to Casino Royale. This is the second of the three films. There is much debate as to whether it is the best or not. I am not actually sure myself. That issue aside it is fantastic action.

I have also been watching a number of films and dvds since my last post and so I thought I would bring you up to date.

The first of my recent viewings was V For Vendetta. Now I have never read the source material. But its author has disavowed the film, and in fact all the film versions of his works. The film tells the tale of a future Britain which is under the control of a one party state. The three central characters are Evie, played by Natalie Portman, V played by Hugo Weaving and the police inspector played by Stephen Rea. Portman is drawn into a web of violence and intrigue when she is saved from the police by V. He shows her that not all is well with society. Rea plays the policeman charged with catching V and Evie. As his investigations progress he comes to question the truth that he is being told by the state. It is good comic book fun and I would certainly recommend it for a light evening in.

Since the 1990s we have seen a number of films which are in the style of the classic film noirs of the 1930s and 1940s. The difference for me is that the violence in the old films was more in the mind rather than on the screen. These new films are much more in your face. The Usual Suspects and LA Confidential whilst both being excellent films missed something. The same is true of The Black Dahlia. Brian De Palma who has never knowingly avoided violence in his films strikes the same chord and in my opinion the film suffers for that. He is able to capture the style and the image of the time much as he did in The Untouchables but the film is not as good as it could be. The cast are fine with nobody being particularly outstanding. The next two films must be seen together to be truly appreciated.

Letters From Iwo Jima and Flags of Our Fathers bring together the talents of Clint Eastwood, Steven Spielberg and Paul Haggis. They both tell the story of the American landings at Iwo Jima which became one of the most iconic miltary actions of WWII. The stories are told from both sides of the events. Letters is the Japanese version of what the defenders went through to try and save their island. It is in Japanese so unless you are fluent you will need the subtitles. Ken Watanabe is spellbinding as the general charged with the island's defence. Battling with his duty to his family and his duty to his country. He is shown in a similar light to a young soldier who faces the same challenge.

Flags tells the tale from the point of view of the soldiers who raised the flag on Mount Suribachi in that now iconic image. It tells the tale particularly from the view of three soldiers and is partially shot in flashback. For me the standout performance comes from Adam Beach as Ira Hayes who has to endure the racism of the American nation and the thoughts that his friends didn't all make it back and why was he special. Watch out for Jamie Bell of Billy Elliot fame. In terms of films about the war in the Pacific these are two of the best films I have ever seen and are up there with Tora Tora Tora and The Battle of Midway.

Adam Beach coincidentally appeared in my final film recommendation of the week

This film by HBO tells of the tale of how the Sioux nation was brought onto the reservation and generally treated like dirt by the white settlers who wanted the gold that they could mine in the Black Hills of Dakota and in particular take revenge for the Little Big Horn. Adam Beach plays a young sioux boy who is given the opportunity to train as a doctor and to help advance his people's cause. Slowly he comes to realise along with Sitting Bull and Red Cloud that this will never happen. This is a sad and moving film with many great cameos. Beach is ably supported by Aidan Quinn, Anna Paquin and August Schellenberg. This is one of those films that you probably will only want to watch once but you should do so given the chance.

More soon.

Jonathan

Olympic avoidance part 2

Well this week I generally ignored my own advice and didn't actually watch any of the films I recommended last week. But as they say that is my prerogative. However, I did visit the library and borrow a couple of items. The first was the SciFi channel's version of Dune. Regular visitors will recall that I watched the movie version a few weeks ago ( and if you don't recall then shame on you for not reading my excellent review). Like it's 'illustrious' predecessor it does take some liberties with the source material. However, it tends to hang together considerably better. Although the effects won awards they are, in my opinion, secondary to the story and you actually notice them less than you did in the Lynch version. There are fewer well known actors in this version but the established stars do not overplay the role. However, the portrayal of Gurney Halleck did not work for me in either version. The other offering from the library was The Box of Delights which was brought out in the 1980s and although the effects look rusty today the story still holds together and it kept Tom occupied for a couple of days.



In other news I, along with my doubles partner, am through to the University Staff Badminton League semi finals. My beer gut diminishes and fitness looms. I have driven my car 3 times this month and have only used a quarter of a tank so the environment is slightly happier. In other sporting comment, I have to reflect on the fact that within minutes of the start of competition at the Olympics when British 'medal hopes' started to fail to perform the usual 'oh well he was never really expected to perform' comments started to be trotted out by the BBC.


On to the movie recommendations for this week. The first movie of note is The Mummy Returns which is, unsurprisingly, the sequel to The Mummy which I recommended last week. On any other day this would be my movie of the day. Unlike most sequels it actually compares favourably to its predecessor. The action comes thick and fast and the thrills are always there. Unfortunately it is showing on the same day as Fargo. This is a very black comedy by the Coen Brothers. Although there is no star and it is an ensemble film the 'ensemble' cast is exceptionally good. Frances McDormand and William H Macy are outstanding. However, the film is partially stolen by the hapless hitmen played by Steve Buscemi and Peter Stormare. This is undoubtedly a 'better' film than The Mummy returns but don't dismiss the other film. Both will keep you entertained and hooked.

Sunday night brings comic book adventure in the shape of Hellboy. Ron Perlman is wonderful as the slightly world weary demon and the action just moves along at a great pace. This is the usual comic book stuff so don't watch it expecting much in the way of pathos. The supporting cast including John Hurt is excellent. This is just black comic book humour at its best.

Then on Monday night we have one of the blackest comedies I have ever seen. It also happens to be one of the best comedy films I have ever seen and has one of the best soundtracks you will ever hear on film. Grosse Pointe Blank is the story of a world weary assassin who starts to get things wrong and is given a final chance which coincides with his High School Reunion.

John Cusack plays Martin Blank but the film is littered with fabulous performances. Joan Cusack plays his slightly psychotic secretary who calmly goes round ordering hollow point ammo without batting an eyelid. Dan Aykroyd plays Grocer who is trying to muscle in on Blank's action and at the same time persuade him to join a 'union'. Alan Arkin plays Blank's long suffering psychiatrist who knows what Blank does but is too afraid to tell him to go away. Minnie Driver plays Blank's ex who has never left town. Blank is chased by feelance assassins, Grocer, the NSA and discovers that he has to kill his ex's daddy. Dad delivers possibly the best line in the entire film when Martin tells him what he does for a living.

On Tuesday there is X2 the sequel to X Men. Again it is a worthy successor and arguably exceeds it. Also there is Every Which Way But Loose which is one of those films which show that Clint Eastwood can do comedy. As usual with Clint's films it features an excellent ensemble cast of actors with whom Eastwood works regularly. The sequel Any Which Way You Can is showing on Wednesday night. Not, in my opinion, as good as the first but still worth a look.

Thursday sees T2. There are those who would argue that this is Arnie's best film. Allow him to operate within his limited ability he is great fun. The effects in this film were mind blowing at the time and still look good even today. When Arnie gets it right it is wonderful entertainment when he gets it wrong it is Mr Freeze in Batman. Robert Patrick is excellent as the other Terminator. Edward Furlong is suitably irritating as John Connor and Linda Hamilton is again outstanding as Sarah Connor. Ignore the spin off television series watch this. If you are after good acting then watch Marlon Brando or Laurence Olivier. If you want excellent entertainment you won't regret watching this.

Lastly on Friday night there is City Slickers featuring Billy Crystal being well the same character he always plays up against the late great Jack Palance.

Have a good week.

How to avoid the olympics and stupid people

Well hello again everyone and here are the film recommendations and reviews of the week. My aim this week I am giving you alternatives to watching the sport and having a normal life instead. My health kick policy of 'get fit or die trying' moves on apace and I am doing a 2.25 mile walk, badminton twice a week and the bike is about to be dusted off. Yes fitness beckons, it is a dim light at the end of a long tunnel at the moment.

The stupid people of which I speak are the woman who in her seventies without a child parked in a mother and baby spot when there was a disabled spot nearer the shop and general parking nearer as well. But even this was topped by the four lads who were in 2 cars parked up at a petrol pump who were smoking. They were in line for a Darwin award.

Now on to the reviews. Last Saturday night I went to see the latest Batman film, The Dark Knight. To say it was dark was an understatement. It certainly should have had a 15 certificate rather than the 12a it was given. Heath Ledger (below) was outstanding and assuming there are no other sick, simple or mad performances of equal stature this year he may be in line for awards.

It is worth seeing as it is excellent entertainment.

Saturday is an excellent day for avoiding exposure to sport if you so choose. There are three excellent films which are all excellent entertainment. The first recommendation of the day is The Mummy. This was the first film in the franchise and I actually watched it on DVD earlier this week. For pure entertainment and action this is an ideal film. The 12-certificate will probably have the kids getting annoyed but there is violence and death in it the certificate is probably about right. Rachel Weisz is stunning and Brendan Fraser is outstanding. With the third film in the series out shortly watch this first to get you in the mood. Later on there is The Sixth Sense. This film was famously ruined for millions in this country when a Radio 5 travel reporter blurted out the plot twist live on national radio. Fortunately I didn't hear this and was able to enjoy the film when I eventually got to see it. The twist is obvious from quite a way off but the film is entertaining and Willis and Hayley Joel Osment are exceptional not your run of the mill horror this one - you actually have to think a bit. Lastly there is Throw Momma From the Train. This is exceptional because it is supposed to be a comedy. Danny De Vito and Billy Crystal are outstanding but they are outdone by the deliciously grotesque performance of Anne Ramsey as Momma. This will have you howling with laughter and at the same time marvelling at the remake of Hitchcock's Strangers on a Train.

On Sunday there are two contrasting yet equally great films. The first is The Princess Bride. It is a wonderful family film. The children will love the fantasy and the adults will love the performances, comedy and one liners. If ever you meet anybody who does not love this film do not trust them they are dangerous people who have no soul and seek to take over the universe. By contrast there is Crimson Tide. This a post Cold War submarine thriller done in exuberant style by Jerry Bruckheimer. Gene Hackman and Denzel Washington put in outstanding performances and are ably supported by the likes of Viggo Mortensen. This is an exceptional thriller and will keep you gripped right the way through.

On Monday night we have I, Robot. Whilst it can never claim to be the greatest film in the world it is good entertainment. I have never actually read the book on which it is based so cannot comment on whether it is a good adaptation. On Tuesday we have yet more Bruckheimer fare with Armageddon in which Bruce Willis and his band save the world. Again if you are looking for thoughtprovoking entertainment this is not what you seek. It is a thrill ride.

Wednesday night we have an Elmore Leonard double bill - well sort of. We have Get Shorty and the sequel Be Cool. The first is one of Travolta's best performances. The cast that is put together is great. Danny De Vito, Gene Hackman and Rene Russo are all excellent. The story is fantastic and really does the original book justice. It is as with many of the films discussed tonight great entertainment. It is disappointing that the same cannot be said of the sequel Be Cool. Yes Travolta is good and is supported by Uma Thurman. Unfortunately we are also faced with Vince Vaughan and The Rock. It is good fun but not a patch on the first film.

Thursday night we have the history ignoring Scotland fest that is Braveheart. As with most Hollywood films it bears only a passing resemblance to real fact but is nevertheless a good diversion for an evening. Lastly on Friday night there is Lorenzo's Oil this is also based on true events but unlike Braveheart does at least tend to stick to them. This is one of those films which makes you feel good at the end but you may not want to watch it a second time.

More next week.

Films of the week

Well here we go again wuth my pick of this week's films. For those of you not currently in the UK treat these as DVD recommendations if you like. Saturday night has three offerings. In descending order of merit we start with The Killing Fields. This was one of the first films I ever went to the cinema to see on my own. It is one of the most spiritually uplifting films I have ever seen but it is not an easy watch by any stretch of the imagination. That being said the ending is one of the most emotionally powerful scenes I have ever watched. Watch out for performances from John Malkovich who is as impressive as ever and the much maligned Julian Sands. The tragedy of this film is enhanced by the fact Haing S Ngor was killed in Los Angeles. From the sublime to the ridiculous now. Die Hard 2. Not nearly as good as its predecessor it is nevertheless a good couple of hours entertainment. Lastly we make the jump to ludicrous speed with Escape To Victory. This is The Great Escape meets Match of the Day. Whilst the appearance of Stallone as a goalkeeper is faintly ridiculous this film is a real cult hit.

Sunday is not exactly awash with films but there is one outstanding offering. Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story is an outstanding film. As to how accurate a portrayal of the day to day reality of the life of the film icon it is I cannot say. As entertainment it is top rate. Jason Lee is compelling in the title role. Earlier on in the day is A Bridge Too Far which with its cast of thousands of the great and good. As great war films go it is not the best but it is worth a watch. Anthony Hopkins is as usual excellent. If you are looking for truly light entertainment then go for Carry On Dick. I am not a big fan of the Carry On films but this is one of the better ones. On Monday the only film of note is Local Hero. It is a great quirky film featuring one of the few Hollywood stars who can do quirky - Burt Lancaster.

Tuesday's two film offerings are Unbreakable and Kickboxer. Unbreakable is an offering from the man who brought you The Sixth Sense. This film is not unfortunately in that league (you don't see dead people everywhere). Bruce Willis meets Samuel L Jackson again. Willis cannot be harmed and is 'unbreakable' Jackson on the other hand is practically made of glass. Jackson is ultimately the bad guy and Willis a force for good. It is an intriguing watch. Kickboxer is one of the few Jean Claude Van Damme offerings that actually made it into the cinemas. As an action packed violence fest it is actually not bad at all. It does nothing to dispel the opinion that Van Damme couldn't act his way out of a paper bag but is nonetheless a diverting evening's entertainment.

Wednesday presents a number of alternatives. Heaven Can Wait is a remake of the 1940s film Here Comes Mr Jordan. It is widely acknowledged as being one of the best remakes in cinema history. Well worth a look. Steven Seagal gets a look in twice with two formulaic offerings in Belly of the Beast and The Foreigner. If you have seen any of his offerings you will pretty much know what happens in both of these. Lastly is the End of Days. Arnie gets all apocalyptic. He gets acted off screen by Gabriel Byrne as Satan.

Thursday brings Mission Impossible 2 and Murder By Decree. The first is the big budget sequel to Mission Impossible. It is not nearly as good as its predecessor but then few sequels ever are. For trivia fans the villain in this film is played by Dougray Scott. Had this film not overrun we would never have had Hugh Jackman as Wolverine in the X Men films. Murder By Decree is a Sherlock Holmes solves Jack the Ripper story. Christopher Plummer is OK as the great detective. Unfortunately this focuses on the version of the myth that says it was the Freemasons covering up for the Royal family. It is about as plausible as Patricia Cornwell's version of the myth.

Friday night is the pick of the week. The outstanding offering is The Shawshank Redemption. This is without doubt the best adaptation of a Stephen King work ever committed to screen. OK it takes a few liberties with the story but it still works. The performances particularly by the two leads are stellar. But the supporting cast is also outstanding in particular Bob Gunton and Clancy Brown. Also outstanding this week is The Jackal. It is a remake of The Day of the Jackal. OK it shifts everything to the US it introduces the world to Richard Gere's terrible Irish accent but it maintains the good bits of the original. It is cracking entertainment. Also check out Wargames and Chicken Run. This final film is Aardman does The Great Escape. It is fabulous family entertainment.

Sporting success, bag ladies and other animals...

A week before making his First Communion Tom was at his rugby club for the end of season awards. The club doesn't have a player of the year awards but gives an award to all players. They do however have a few special awards. These are clubman of the year and most improved player of the year. This year a new award was introduced for tag dedication.

The inaugural winner of this award can be seen to your left. His prize was a rugby ball signed by Martin Johnson captain of the world cup winning England team So Tom has held something touched by a world cup winner and clearly destiny awaits.

Tom's award came one week after his team won the SubStottie trophy at the Alnwick Rugby Festival. This was awarded for the battle of the 5th placed teams in his age group. It was his last tag rugby union game. However a month ago Tom represented his school in a tag rugby league festival. He was the only year 3 player in the first team. He did have the misfortune to be coached by his dad on the day but the team was still triumphant.

The reason that the photo is so blurry is that just as the team were starting their championship winning match the heavens opened and everybody was soaked. Tom has adopted his usual position of standing in the back row (he is on the right).

But what I hear you ask has Jenni been up to? In general it has been her usual idiosyncratic approach to life and the occasional bouts of total chaos.

Meet Jenni the bag lady...

Jenni the mistress of chaos...




and finally Jenni the style icon.







More to come soon.

At long last!!!!

Well after much ado about very little here we are family pictures and recent ones too!!! Unfortunately due to a bunch of eager people who couldn't be bothered to wait this is about the best photo from inside the church that I could get. But you get the idea anyway. Tom is at the back left, just look up from the woman with the camera. This was on possibly the hottest day of the year and so most people were roasting alive inside the church. Everybody seemed to enjoy the whole event but it had to be done against the clock to get the next shift in.



Since chaos was ensuing at the church and the fact that I had gone all Nigella and baked flourless chocolate brownies and made summer fruit cheesecake the party repaired to chez Kirton for the photos. That is me in one of my new suits and the dark glasses (classy eh!!). Mum was none too happy about the photos but the public have demanded photos of the event.



Having been asked to lose the glasses we took this photo. To those of you who don't know the gentleman on the right is Emmett, Thomas' godfather who had come up from the deep south of the country especially for the occasion.

The Kirton men then gathered for this photo. It is not often that Dad and I are in the presence of sporting greatness but only a week before Tom had been awarded a special award for dedication at his rugby club. More on the future sporting great in a separate blog. If you look to the left on the slideshow you can see all the photos. Unfortunately the food didn't last long enough to be photographed.

More to come in a moment thrill seekers.

Bad Films

This week I sat down to watch two DVD's one to see if it was really as bad as everybody would have us believe and the other to see if it was any good in the first place. The films in question were David Lynch's adaptation of Frank Herbert's Dune and the second was Ultraviolet starring Milla Jovovich.

Dune is roundly condemned by critics the world over and provokes heated debate amongst those who have actually read the source material on which the film was based. When the inlay to the DVD itself tells you that a film is not that good you really have to worry. Is it is as bad as the critics would have you believe well no actually it isn't. Is it a good adaptation of the book. In parts yes in parts no. Whilst the use of a narrator is good the narration does not adequately explain who is who where they came from and why they are where they are. I found the script to be just terrible. The effects look decidely ropey which is never a help. Dune could, in the right hands, have become a masterpiece. Unfortunately it fails because the script and let's be honest some of the acting is dire. It doesn't matter how good an actor is if the material they have to work with is lousy. The later SciFi channel miniseries were better but only showed to a limited audience. It is with some trepidation that I have discovered that there is to be a new version out in either 2009 or 2010. Given the state of CGI today this could be monumental. But whoever makes this will have to get round the issue of script and explaining who everybody is ikf it is to stand any chance of success.

I hope that this along with another remaked in 2010, Highlander, are not condemned finally to the rubbish bin of the film world.


So then I sat to watch Ultraviolet. It appeared to me to be a kind of The Matrix meets Underworld meets Equilibrium. Unfortunately it is not even as good as the worst of these three (Underworld just in case any of you are wondering). The frightening thing is that this film makes Aeon Flux look good and that is really difficult. The script is lousy, the acting worse. To those of you who like vampire lore and vampire movies this really is one to avoid. The 'plot twist' such as it is can be seen coming after only a short while. To spare you the torture - the archcardinal is a vampire and his 'kid' ( who looks like Wesley Crusher) is not there to save humanity and end the war.


So if you are standing there in the video shop and all you can have is Dune or Ultraviolet get Dune it is at least bearable.